The Kitten Brand

14 Sep
 
What do you know? I open the front door on Sunday night, after being away for 2 days, & there are what appear to be little pieces of paper all over the floor. I turn on the light & see that it’s ripped up pieces of toilet paper… not only in the foyer, but going all the way up the stairs! Upon further scrutiny, I find strings of toilet paper, that dastardly Kitten Brand (or so the company that makes my preferred choice of tushy-wiping material is referring to it) strewn haphazardly about the house and more bits & pieces of it, in every shape & form imaginable… and in every spot you could ever imagine!
 
This is a photo I found on the internet that closely resembled my situation…  
                                                                                                                                            Sammy goes for a roll, alright!
 
My friend always laughs about that, how those marketing idiots came up with that title, the infamous Kitten Brand… and what do kittens actually do with it? Wipe their rumps with it first to see if it’s okay for us people to use, or what?
 
You know, I’ve heard of it being a dog’s world & it’s all going to the dogs, I’m sure, but lately all I’ve been seeing is feline fantasia running amok here in my household. I think it’s really the cat who rules the roost in eez werld.
 
 Yeah, I know… I LOVE YOU, TOO!
 
After I feed my little guy, he cleans himself & he’s out the door looking for his tiger-tail patterned little girlfriend. Yesterday, he actually had the balls to invite her in the house & tried to slink past me, with her following right in his heels (or should I say paws), straight into my bedroom, right after they came in the house, after I left my front door open again (silly me). Who knows? Perhaps Jacky picked up a few pointers from me (haha). I kicked the both of them out anyway, after I decided they were not of age yet to have sex & I might be implicated for harbouring underaged pussy & promoting their illicit activities.
 
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