Like Talking To A Wall?

22 Feb
 
You’ve all probably heard that old joke about what you do with your asshole first thing in the morning, I’m sure! It really makes me wonder, now that I’ve had a few minutes to think about it, why anyone would want to sleep beside one anyway for? I just found a chain mail on the internet  when I typed into the search "when a man’s a shit &… (you don’t wanna hear the rest of it). Anyway, here goes (copied from http://rageagainstthemanchine.com/2009/10/07/holy-shit-does-this-rule/):
 
I received this list in an e-mail and I’m pretty sure it’s incumbent upon me to share it with the world, seeing as it’s the greatest thing I’ve read in weeks. I especially like number eight.

Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work!
 

1. Don’t put drugs in people’s drinks in order to control their behavior.

2. When you see someone walking by themselves, leave them alone!

3. If you pull over to help someone with car problems, remember not to assault them!

4. NEVER open an unlocked door or window uninvited.

5. If you are in an elevator and someone else gets in, DON’T ASSAULT THEM!

6. Remember, people go to laundry to do their laundry, do not attempt to molest someone who is alone in a laundry room.

7. USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM! If you are not able to stop yourself from assaulting people, ask a friend to stay with you while you are in public.

8. Always be honest with people! Don’t pretend to be a caring friend in order to gain the trust of someone you want to assault. Consider telling them you plan to assault them. If you don’t communicate your intentions, the other person may take that as a sign that you do not plan to rape them.

9. Don’t forget: you can’t have sex with someone unless they are awake!

10. Carry a whistle! If you are worried you might assault someone “on accident” you can hand it to the person you are with, so they can blow it if you do.

And, ALWAYS REMEMBER: if you didn’t ask permission and then respect the answer the first time, you are commiting a crime — no matter how “into it” others appear to be.

WAKE UP BUDDY! YOU FLIPPIN’ REEK!

You need a little more than a cold shower!

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