A day in the life…

17 Aug

…of a queen.


Okydoky, here goes!


It’s sweltering out there in the past 2 days, pushing 40 degrees, but I feel cool, lively, friendly & my usual sarcastically-witty self. I walked for what felt like 500 miles during the past 48 hours or so. It was worth my sore soles to tread for a cause, on that path to freedom.


Not only have I been walking, I’ve also been pushing like mad with this ongoing consignment business that I’ve been diligently working on. It’s finally beginning to be fruitful, and I’ve just negotiated another sale as I’m writing this. I see that I’m on my way to becoming the manager once again here in that which I have proven to excel & succeed. I’m happier than a dog rolling in shit when I see some signs of my endeavours being paid off. I even cleaned this whole place up better than I ever have in a long time, like only this Putzfrau knows how! I’m just cleanin’ up my whole life, all the way around – spic ‘n span and polished, by keeping in mind that CLEANLINESS IS NEXT TO GODLINESS, and what Nina Hagen says in My Way:


“Der Dreck mußt weg sonnst bleibt er da ein ganzes Leben”.


The air is cranked & I look like Heather Graham in The Spy Who Shagged Me, hee hee hee! Seriously now (but I can’t show you what I look like because Ms Flash-Happy’s batteries are on recharge here).


I’m so glad that our fashions are the re-invented in-thang from every 20-30 years ago or so, because I’m happy to wear any or all of that shit for the rest of my life, with the exception of stilettos, of course – and believe me, I have crossed many a mile, like a breeze, in those Euro-leather struts, heh. Puffy cap sleeves, checkerboards, jailbird stripes, velour, sequins, neon, lots of pink, purple, red, black & white… the list goes on. Dreams, themes & schemes of things – aren’t they the greatest? No wonder why the faggots love me (and I  them too, so no offense is being given here).


Yeah, you heard me right. I guess some of them out there must think that I’m one of them lately, just because I love Elton John, Queen & rainbows, and my handle is The Gipsy Queen, to name a few. I guess you could just simply say that I have style (like Ms X agrees) & a helluva lotta class, of which some unfortunate people have none.



I can say it like it is & I can see it for what it is. I can also move in all ways – mysteriously, quietly, loudly, quickly, cunningly, outspokenly (is there even such a werd? ), crassily (?) & craftily, and that can be any of, a combo of, or all at once! I am both a worker bee & a queen bee – hence, The Ultimate Euro Stock Quality Gipsy Queen. So that is probably why I expect others to get their thumbs outta their butts & get a move-on, who knows? I have high expectations, strive for the best in everything, & am constantly changing things around. Altogether, I am a hard act to follow (& you are so very right there, Cheri ). A few of my fave mottos are "when the going gets tough, the tough get going", "you snooze, you lose", and "early to bed & early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy & wise". Those three just about explain it all.  



Maybe my dad was right about me; after all, he started this whole gipsy-thing by teasing me when I was little, saying I had gipsy blood in me, because he knew that it irked me (and he also taught me to fight the boys out there who loved to pick on me, chase my tail & pull on my locks)! Being the creative & knowledge-seeking individual that I always have been, I decided to research and have even become some of these quirky things, even to this very day as I’m writing this & even with things that give people the creeps … my fears, so to speak (hence the expression "you’ve got to get into it before you get out of it"). And you know what? I have found that the things that give you the heeby-jeebies in this life & especially the utmost annoyances of all – those are the fantastically enjoyable things in this one-time around that keeps people ticking & on their toes, believe me this.


And even being a squid, like I have been referred to by some (and the nickname which I also used to peeve), has now actually become a fascinating & wonderful thing for me, after all, for the squid is one of the world’s most unique creatures. And that is what I am as well.


I have this fortune-cookie kinda strip that’s been stuck to the top of my monitor for a few years now, with little pieces of gum (the next best thing after duct tape), which states:


“You are valuable, don’t let anyone make you believe differently”.


I move in mysterious ways at times because I am a very deep person, and deep things that live in deep waters are difficult to fathom more often than not. I truly believe that God has put me on the face of this mother Earth for a reason, whether it’s to be a martyr or a key to gaining wisdom for one & for all, and all the while he also gifted me with talent & individual strength, so I am going to go for the gusto by showing what I’ve got and how I am putting it to good use.


My friend Trace commented that education requires a lot of money, and that is for certain. I read online, for free, for several hours, with up to 16 things open at once, and that is the best gift for any knowledge-seeker that I can possibly think of, considering that the going-rate of some university textbooks alone is around $200 each, for cryin’ out loud!


Before I stray any more from today’s topic(s),  I now feel the need to explain to yooz who don’t know me that well why I am The Gipsy Queen. Ever since I was a young girl, I’ve had this fetish for dressing up like a gipsy. I’m looking for the black & white of me, sporting my mother’s old dark grey & black velvet satin ballroom skirt & a black lacy flowered veil, with my long hair draped over my shoulders, at perhaps the age of 6 or 7. I looked so powerful & fearless in that photo, that’s for sure, haha!


Then my friend brought to light that Hallowe’en in 1993, when I rented a black & orange gipsy outfit from a rent-all outlet on the spur of the moment & on a whim. The funniest part of the evening was when I began to play a child’s horn between my knees & under my skirts!



As for the hairdo I have right now, it’s probably the closest I’ve ever come to being a child again, with my naturally-wavy limp locks gathered & held fast with a small clip at the top, & which is the best happy-go-lucky look I can fink of, from what I have gathered so far. Fuck the hairspray & the ping-pong ball resilient curls!


Shit, enough about me, sorry … I just look & feel great, that’s all. How about you peeps? How are yooz doin’? I gotta go now because my ole dog is sniffin’ my butt.  


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